if i had a dollar for every time ang lee made me cry utilizing the gut-punching power of yearning, i’d have two dollars. it’s not a lot, but like, what the fuck is your problem, man?

what were the jeans in this movie made of? divine intervention? were they stitched by angels?

he’s a loser in the beginning AND is still a loser at the end and you chose to RE-MARRY him?? GIRL! he still doesn’t have a car and is in massive amounts of debt???? but hey, at least your random museum in florida has all of spain’s lost treasure!

great, now i’m going to have to ask my boyfriend if he’d still love me if i were a hawk and he were a wolf and we had to rely on a dopey loser with a brooklyn accent who somehow escaped a medieval prison to return us to our human forms in order to seek revenge on the extremely corrupt priest that did this to us. thanks a lot, richard donner.

i truly believe cher is a witch because every time she opens her mouth, i become deeply mesmerized. forget stanley tucci, they should’ve cast me to tell her how brilliant she is.

man, i really do adore fred’s tight ascot-less polo fit <3 this era was genuinely so iconic!!

you know the protagonists SUCK when i start rooting for the cockblocking murderers.

need the henson family to drop the lore for why england has such intense discriminatory practices against muppets. there’s a history there, i know it.

the muppets, ranked ✧･ﾟ

the “i’ll find you in any lifetime” trope, but make it a lynchian masterpiece starring two of the most unsettling actors of our time. fucking delicious!

ya’ll can’t keep getting away with labeling a movie “monster fucking cinema” when he’s a human for 90% of it. why can’t he look like the dragon people from baldur’s gate 3 when he’s chillin’? this guy was just another sarah j. maas (derogatory) character. i’m hurt, guys, i really am.

(although, if i had abs like that, i’d also never wear a shirt and do a dragon hulk-out just to flex them so… i’m considering.)

ladies, is it gay to fantasize about fatally stabbing your husband (who happens to look an awful lot like nathan fielder) alongside the woman of your nightmares, whom you can draw from memory… she holds your hands like in the pottery scene from ghost as you do it, and then she rips out his heart…? asking for a friend.